After a four day weekend it's an uphill struggle to return to the absurdist routine of office work.
But I am nothing if not a trouper.
Today I am in a different department, relieving a secretary for the rest of this week. I am the temp, which is a lowly, underappreciated position but which has the incredible perk of being able to fly under the radar and do interesting things like surf the net, make personal calls and take extended lunch breaks because you're not important enough to be noticed.
Well, this company is a little different. There are processes; there is 'appropriate workplace behaviour' (and two hour courses to teach it); there is that contrived sense of 'team' amongst the support staff - that canny concept developed by senior managers to make the shitkickers feel more autonomous and important. It's not even 10am and I have already been approached by 3 support staff welcoming me to the department, congratulating me on my future position starting next week at another desk within the department and inviting me to the engagement party of someone I don't even know.
While in some circles this may be considered polite and heartwarming, it merely has the effect of burning a phrase in my brain: cultish behaviour.
Every article I've read on cults - the moonies, jim jones, david koresh, charles manson, the family, scientology (oh yes it is) - has described how they win over fresh blood by making them feel included, wanted, needed and useful. It's a basic psychological tactic but one that I've never seen adopted in a corporate way.
I'm used to the companies where people act like real people - where at least one secretary doesn't talk to you because she considers herself above you as she works for a senior associate, where one secretary offers help but is actually too busy to follow through on her offer, where a few managers might ask you your name if you're lucky but always forget it by lunchtime and forever after call you 'um.....could you please....' and where you are treated like the weirdo newbie you are until such time as you settle in and gradually get to know the other people in the office.
But then again, I may be being a little over-cynical. They're probably all just really nice people.
But I won't be drinking any cordial any time soon.
But I am nothing if not a trouper.
Today I am in a different department, relieving a secretary for the rest of this week. I am the temp, which is a lowly, underappreciated position but which has the incredible perk of being able to fly under the radar and do interesting things like surf the net, make personal calls and take extended lunch breaks because you're not important enough to be noticed.
Well, this company is a little different. There are processes; there is 'appropriate workplace behaviour' (and two hour courses to teach it); there is that contrived sense of 'team' amongst the support staff - that canny concept developed by senior managers to make the shitkickers feel more autonomous and important. It's not even 10am and I have already been approached by 3 support staff welcoming me to the department, congratulating me on my future position starting next week at another desk within the department and inviting me to the engagement party of someone I don't even know.
While in some circles this may be considered polite and heartwarming, it merely has the effect of burning a phrase in my brain: cultish behaviour.
Every article I've read on cults - the moonies, jim jones, david koresh, charles manson, the family, scientology (oh yes it is) - has described how they win over fresh blood by making them feel included, wanted, needed and useful. It's a basic psychological tactic but one that I've never seen adopted in a corporate way.
I'm used to the companies where people act like real people - where at least one secretary doesn't talk to you because she considers herself above you as she works for a senior associate, where one secretary offers help but is actually too busy to follow through on her offer, where a few managers might ask you your name if you're lucky but always forget it by lunchtime and forever after call you 'um.....could you please....' and where you are treated like the weirdo newbie you are until such time as you settle in and gradually get to know the other people in the office.
But then again, I may be being a little over-cynical. They're probably all just really nice people.
But I won't be drinking any cordial any time soon.
posted by belle de dayjob at 10:33 pm
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home