How to make me hate you
It's really simple.
The week before you leave for a business trip to the US which isn't in your calendar, ask me to order a laptop for you from IT services. Don't tell me why you need it or where you are going, I like wondering about it during the idle hours at my desk. Then, at 5.00pm on the day before you leave, please email me and ask me to procure a US adaptor plug for said laptop. This is also the time that you tell me you are travelling overseas for two weeks. It is also the time that you give me a month's worth of scrunched up taxi receipts and ask me to process them - a task which requires your signature for approval but not before I've spent an hour deciphering your mystery trips to mystery meetings that have never existed in your diary.
Please also ask me gently to hurry up and get that adaptor plug as you are leaving soon and need to take it with you. When I run to the basement of the building to get the plug because the stationery department have all gone home and won't deliver it, please do not thank me as I pass it to you, trying to catch my breath after running up and down 7 flights of stairs.
As a parting gesture, please do not tell any of your clients you are away for two weeks in another country because their exasperated sighs when I have to break the news to them myself is music to my ears.
The week before you leave for a business trip to the US which isn't in your calendar, ask me to order a laptop for you from IT services. Don't tell me why you need it or where you are going, I like wondering about it during the idle hours at my desk. Then, at 5.00pm on the day before you leave, please email me and ask me to procure a US adaptor plug for said laptop. This is also the time that you tell me you are travelling overseas for two weeks. It is also the time that you give me a month's worth of scrunched up taxi receipts and ask me to process them - a task which requires your signature for approval but not before I've spent an hour deciphering your mystery trips to mystery meetings that have never existed in your diary.
Please also ask me gently to hurry up and get that adaptor plug as you are leaving soon and need to take it with you. When I run to the basement of the building to get the plug because the stationery department have all gone home and won't deliver it, please do not thank me as I pass it to you, trying to catch my breath after running up and down 7 flights of stairs.
As a parting gesture, please do not tell any of your clients you are away for two weeks in another country because their exasperated sighs when I have to break the news to them myself is music to my ears.
posted by belle de dayjob at 11:14 am
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