Clocked off

Anyone who has ever openly wondered 'where has the time gone?' has never worked in a law firm in the week between Christmas and the New Year.

I can tell you exactly where the time has gone. The hours between midday and 5pm to be precise. They have dragged their sorry arses haltingly across my computer screen, limped across my desktop and slumped over the digital display on my phone where I watched their painful and slow crawl towards hometime. Time is lucky that it is abstract because if it had a mortal body I would beat the fuck out of it for making my life a misery.

In other news my boss, just when I thought he had exhausted his supply of eccentric requests, brought 9 calendars from previous years down from his shelf today and asked me to 'find the one where January 1st starts on a Thursday'. After some searching, I found the railways calendar from 1998 which he happily hung on his wall. When I offered to put back the other used calendars in his time capsule for future years he looked hurt and said 'are you making fun of me?'